People often search in the google about the funny Chemistry Jokes and they are not always satisfied.
Here I’m going to share some top Jokes of all the time. HOPE you all will find something more interesting here. There are also some funny pictures at the end of this article. SO don’t forget to check them all.
I’m A Chemist I Have All The Solutions For Everything
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 1
Wife calls her scientist husband… “Honey… It’s Friday… you’re late…”
“I’m busy with my team in an experiment.”
“We’ve just added a derivative of C2H5OH with ambient temperature H2O and aqueous CO2. To cool this mixture added some super low temperature, solidified H2O, now while waiting for some protein, we are fumigating the lab with vapors of nicotine…
It’s a 4 or 5 round experiment… So I will be late.”
“Oh dear… I won’t disturb you… please take your time…”
C2H5OH is (Alcohol)
H2O is (Water)
Aqueous is CO2 (Soda)
Protein is (Chicken)
Vapors of Nicotine is (Smoking)
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 2
Q: What is the chemical formula for “banana”?
Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They’re cheaper than day rates.
Q: What is the most important rule in chemistry?
A: Never lick the spoon!
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 3
A neutron entersa bar and orders a beverage. The bartender sits on a stool and provides him with a drink. The neutron asks ‘ How much to drink, after completing his drink? ‘
The bartender replies ‘For you, NO CHARGE!’
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 4
I just wanted to joke about sodium and Hydrogen
Bt NAH I cant
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 5
How can I learn organic chemistry with fun?
This is a story of Bromine and Chlorine. Both of them are looking to marry and both want to marry Aishwarya Rai. They take a flight to Mumbai and start looking for Aishwarya Rai.
Someone tells Bromine that he can find Aishwarya Rai at a specific party, so he rushes there. (Separately)
As soon as he reaches there and finds Juhi Chawla at the gate.
JC: Hi Bromine.
Br: Hi Juhi.
JC: What are you doing here?
Br: I have come here to marry Aishwarya Rai.
JC: Oh, Why don’t you instead, marry me?
Br: No, no. I have come here to selectively marry Aishwarya Rai. (Saying this Bromine rushes in to find Aishwarya Rai and marries her)
Soon after, Chlorine reaches the gate and finds Juhi Chawla at the gate.
JC: Hi Chlorine.
Cl: Hi Juhi.
JC: What are you doing here?
Br: I have come here to marry Aishwarya Rai.
JC: Oh, Why don’t you instead, marry me?
Cl: Ohk. Let’s marry.
So, what we can get from this story is that Bromine is very selective with whom it marries (read: reacts) and Chlorine will react with whatever it finds first irrespective of its selectivity.
Elaborate stories can always make anything fun, especially Organic Chemistry.
Chemistry Jokes no: 6
A photon inspects a hotel and is requested to assist him in his luggage.. He says, “No, I’m traveling light.”
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 7
A proton and a neutron were walking down the street.
The proton says, “Stop, I dropped an electron. Help me find it. “The neutron asks,” You’re sure?.” The proton replies, “Yes, I’m positive.”
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 8
Does anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na.
Yeah, I know that was sodium funny.
Funny Chemistry Jokes no: 9
“Was it necessary to give another name to molarity? “No, it was just a formality.”
Chemistry Jokes no: 10
“Were you aware that you could cool down to -273.15 C and still be 0k?”
Chemistry Jokes no: 11
Did you know that potassium gave oxygen a second date?
How did it go?
It went OK 2 !
Chemistry Jokes no: 12
Honey, we’re a galvanic cell. Can’t you feel the electricity flowing between us?
Chemistry Jokes no: 13
What was Avogadro’s favourite sport? Golf – because he always got a mole-in-one.
Chemistry Jokes no: 14
Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was a polar bear.
Chemistry is never a boring subject. It is really so much interesting and funny. If you love Chemistry you can feel its deepness along with its happiness.
I made a chemistry joke there was no reaction
did you hear that oxygen is going out with magnesium
You are overreacting
Chemistry of happiness
Chemistry Jokes no: 15 ( Element jokes )
I don’t know why everyone is so upset about untraditional family structures, it’s been happening in the animal world for years. For example, all water buffalos have three parents
One oxygen buffalo and two hydrogen buffalos.
Sodium and Hydrogen should be friends.
NaH, sounds like a bad idea.
Fat women are like hydrogen
single and abundant.
Hydrogen asks his parents, Sodium, and Potassium if he can go to a party.
First, he asks his mom, Sodium. He knows that she is very strict and she will probably say no. “Na,” she says, exactly what he expects
He decides to ask his dad. He is much less strict and was in a good mood. Maybe he can let Hydrogen go to the party. “k,” he says.
Nuclei and Electrons are the original hipsters of the universe.
They were hydrogen before it was cool.
How many periodic elements does it take to turn on a light?
Sulfur, Tungsten, Iodine, Technetium, and Hydrogen.
Dating Hydrogen Molecule
Potassium and oxygen went on a date …… it went all right.
Oxygen and magnesium went on a date. The other chemicals were like ‘omg’!
Two noble gases went on a date. There was no reaction.
Two protons went on a date. There was no attraction.
Sodium and chlorine went on a date. There was assault.
Potassium and water went on a date. It was lit.
But then when the……………………………..
Hydrogen and chlorine went on a date. They felt a little sour after it.
and again……Hydrogen and nitrogen went on a date. They had a basic night out.
What do you get when you put hydrogen into the air?
Hydrogen and Carbon walk into a bar…
Hydrogen: Hey I was thinking about starting a business about electrons and wanted to ask if you wanted to be a partner
Carbon: Sure! I’ve got nothing to lose!
18+ Hydrogen jokes
Two hydrogen atoms and an oxygen atom had a threesome…
Made me so wet.
What did the sexual deviant hydrogen say to the oxygen?
Do you like bondage?
My hotel room has a partial water view!
I would have preferred oxygen but hydrogen is nice, too.
Why did the big ball of hydrogen and helium give Harvey Weinstein a blowjob?
Because he said he would make her a star!
Helium walks into a bar, where he sees Argon, Krypton, and Neon sitting at a table. They cast dirty looks in his direction. Neon stands up and shouts across the bar, “Get your ass out of here! You don’t deserve to be a noble gas, and they won’t serve your kind here!” Helium does not react.
You make Lithium react with Argon??
What is a funny Lithium joke?
There’s only one Lithium joke in the world. Honest…Would I Li to you?
What do you call a good looking scientist?
Ba-Be ( Barium, Beryllium)
You must be a compound of Barium and Beryllium
Because you’re a total BaBe
Make like Beryllium, Muriaticum, Iodine, Neon and
Are you full of beryllium, gold, and titanium?
Cos you are Be-Au-Ti-full
What should my next joke Be?
Beryllium not kidding.
No one uses any chemistry jokes or meme anymore… I think people guess its Boron.
My date was Boron me…..So Iodine alone tonight
We want you…… To join the boron group
Teacher: Today we will talk about the periodic table. Does anybody know what element I am mostly made of?
Carbon and Helium were having a conversation.
Carbon: “ And then I said, Barium!”
Osmium walks into the room.
“What’s so funny guys?”
Carbon whispers to Helium: “Don’t tell him. He’s too dense to get it.”
Have you heard about that new app, “Cinder?” It’s great for carbon dating! 🙂
(I just thought of this joke while walking to my car. I wouldn’t be surprised if I’m not the first to come up with it. Apologies, if it’s been made before.)
(In case it isn’t obvious, it’s a play on the *dating* app, “Tinder.”)
I know, I know. You’re saying dang it. I have already graduated from school and besides math, I hated chemistry so why would I be interested in jokes about carbon? As the professor would say, to answer your question is because besides carbon monoxide the first lesson of organic chemistry is carbon is a whore.
Damn, are you gold, titanium, sulfur, titanium, carbon?
Because you look AU TI S TI C
I am hungry I want some tantalum, carbon, oxygen, and sulfur
A coworker made a joke about carbon monoxide poisoning…I told him it was tasteless
How did Carbon propose to Hydrogen?
With a “Carbonkneel”
Where was Potassium, Fluorine and Carbons favorite place to eat?
You seem to be a Molybdenum Thorium Erbium Fluorine Uranium Carbon Potassium ErbiumBecause you’re a real Mo Th Er F U C K Er
What the difference between carbon and my ex? She could form more than 4 bonds at the same time.
I once went to carbon dating…………………..
I was arrested because carbon was only 14
Someone asked me whether I know what is produced when Nitrogen oxidizes. I said NO
What do you call nitrogen after the sun rises?
Girl, are you composed of Fluorine, Uranium, and Nitrogen?
Cause you seem like a lot of F-U-N
Can silicon bond with nitrogen?
Of course not. That would be a SIN.
Do you want to hear a joke about Nitrogen and Oxygen
Why is there a hole up the middle of a man’s penis?
To supply oxygen to the brain.
I have an oxygen addiction
I tried to quit, but after a few minutes, I was feeling blue.
My friend said that he replaced the Oxygen with Uranium in a water molecule.
I was like, “HUH?”
Who wants to hear a joke about oxygen and potassium?
What did Oxygen say when he realized he is losing an argument with Hydrogen?
An oxygen atom was looking forward to a threesome,
Instead, the poor guy got ozoned.
There was a boy named Billy and he wasn’t very smart
He lived with his mother in a small town. Nobody liked him because he was really stupid, least of all his school teacher who was always annoyed with him.
One day Billy’s mother came to the school to learn how her son was doing. The teacher plainly told the mother that her son was a complete failure, he received the lowest grades and honestly she had never seen anyone half so stupid in her entire teaching career.
Billy’s mother was so enraged and embarrassed that she took her son and moved to another state.
25 years later the teacher was diagnosed with a very serious illness. The doctors told her that heart surgery was necessary, and very complex operation was required, an operation so difficult that only one doctor in the country was qualified enough to perform it. The teacher weighed her options and decided that she had no choice other than to do the surgery. Before being administered a general anesthetic, the teacher was told that the famed surgeon was already boarding the plane and would soon be here.
When she opened her eyes after the successful surgery, she saw a handsome young doctor who smiled at her. She wanted to thank him, raised her hand, but suddenly everything went numb, she found that she couldn’t produce a sound and her face went blue. She died instantly. The doctor was shocked and while trying to discover what had gone wrong he turned around and saw Billy the hospital janitor who unplugged the oxygen supply equipment to plug in the vacuum cleaner.
Come on, did you really think that Billy would become a surgeon?
Consuming Oxygen is a dangerous addiction.
People just keep inhaling it till they die.
What is oxygen’s favorite place?
The O zone
Dude, you should definitely come to this pool party. Sodium Jokes There is 2 hydrogen out there for each oxygen!
How do you react if a lion in front of you ..tell me in the language of chemistry…
I will say Oxygen, Magnesium! Lithium, Oxygen, Nitrogen!
If Donald Trumpwas asked “If oxygen was discovered in 1783, how could human breathe before”, this would probably be his answer.
I must say that a lot of individuals asked this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me, and they ask me. They say, ‘How do people breathe before the discovery of oxygen’? And I tell them, look, we know what oxygen is. We’ve had almost eight years of the worst kind of chemistry you can imagine. Oh, my God, I can’t believe it. Without the discovery of oxygen, the world would be terrible. It’s just terrible. Look, if you want to know what oxygen is, do you want to know what oxygen is? I’ll tell you. First of all, it’s the O in the periodic table. By the way, I love the element O. It’s probably my favorite element, no it is my favorite element despite I don’t know what O is. You know what, it’s probably more like the Hydrogen but with a lot of proton in it. A lot. If I’m being honest. I like a lot of protons. Except for Marco Rubio, now he’s a neutron that I don’t like. Though, I probably shouldn’t say that. He’s a nice guy, but he’s like, ‘Helium, Neon,’ on and on, like that. He’s inert! You know what I mean? He’s like an inert gas. I don’t know. I mean, you know. So, we have all these protons, and we can add them and subtract them and add them. TIMES them even. Did you know that? We can time them OR divide them, they don’t tell you that, and I’ll tell you, no one is better at the order of periodic table than me. You wouldn’t believe it. So, we’re gonna be the best on breathing oxygen, believe me.
Chemistry cat communicate with manganese, oxygen, and tungsten
Chemistry cat, Your jokes are getting old.
Some people say you can’t live without love…
I think oxygen is more important. Isn’t it?
Wanna hear a joke about arsenic, iodine, and fluorine?
What will you say when you are in a chemistry class and you arehungry?
Fluorine, Osmium, Oxygen, Darmstadtium…
Are you made of fluorine and astatine?
Because you’re Fat
Why was neon sad?
He saw chlorine and sodium bonding together.
He threw sodium chloride at me! That’s a salt!
2 Na is the name of a fish… and it is made of two sodium atoms…Tuna fish
Teacher: The chemical symbol of Barium? Student: BA Teacher: For sodium? Student: NA Teacher: What will we get if 1 atom of BA & 2 atoms of NA combined? Student: BANANA
If Avogadro calls tell him to leave his number !!!!
Look, mom carbon tetra fluoride !!!!
Love is in the air …?wrong …Nitrogen, oxygen and carbon dioxide are in the air
chemistry jokes: Adenine, Thymine, and Uracil
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